Ever since I was maybe the age of 13 I had this mentality that the more space a person takes up the more noticeable he was. So I walked around with my lungs full of air until NoFap. I would see a girl I found cute, I would fill up lungs. Walking down a busy street? Lungs filled up with air. I cared so much about everyone else, I would just lie to myself on how this is important to look big and dominant. I needed people to notice me, this idea was so important to me.
Well it’s not, not important at all. Ever since I quit I’ve had a clear mind. New thoughts coming into my head. And finally I’m walking relaxed, I didn’t notice but my shoulders were pretty tense while I would walk. I would always try to give that dominant image to people, but in the end I was just hurting myself. Now I feel relaxed, I feel happy, I notice the things around me now and I just feel better.
Now I wake up in the morning, sit outside for 15 minutes with my mug of coffee and just relax. Best way to start the day.
Even though it is a constant battle to fight my urges, it always feels better to know that I defeated the urge. I know I’m becoming a better person and I hope this inspires readers to do the same